Friday, November 12, 2010

What I've Learned...

Well friends, I've done it. I have been in the great state of Texas for almost five months now. I didn't think I would make it this far. In fact, I almost didn't. Although I appeared happy-go-lucky for the first few weeks here (ha, ha!) I was actually miserable.

Mind you, this was the first time I have been away from Nebraska for more than two weeks in my entire life. And I'm not going to bullshit you: IT'S BEEN SCARY AS SHIT. Moving away to college was much, MUCH easier because you have built-in friends at the dorms. In college, I met some of my best friends while brushing my teeth in the community bathroom. But here, I actually have to leave my house in order to make friends. Quite terrifying to say the least.

After getting over my initial culture shock (and missing my family and friends terribly!), I've actually enjoyed myself. I work a lot on weekends, so I haven't had much of an opportunity to experience the full flavor of Dallas. But since moving here, I've been compiling a list of things I've learned/seen/done. So I thought I would share them with my oh-so-faithful readers.

1. Driving Nightmare!
We have roads that look like this here:

I come from a place where roads look like this:

(Okay, not QUITE like this. I think this might be a desert.)

There are sometimes, when I'm trying to merge onto a freeway, that I literally close my eyes and veer left, hoping for the best. Oh, and did I mention that I drive a Grand Prix. I LOVE my car, but everyone down here drives a BMW/Lexus/Batmobile. Do you know how much pressure is on me to drive less ignorant down here? If I hit the freaking Batmobile, my insurance will drop me because repairing one headlight costs more than all of my college loans combined.

2. Watch out for old women!
You know how highways have marquees to tell you if a child is missing and what not (Amber alerts, I think they're called)? Well, down here, the only signs I ever see are "Missing Elderly Woman" signs. For some reason, elderly men never go missing. But watch out for those elderly women! The signs don't have descriptions of the missing elderly woman on them, so how the heck am I supposed to spot her? Do I report any and every elderly woman who looks lost? And how do I report if they don't give me a phone number? And, the biggest question, how does someone misplace their grandmother? Watch her ass. It's not like she's going to BOLT out the door.

3. There are Huskers EVERYWHERE.
I repeat: There are Huskers EVERYWHERE. Last night, I went over to Fort Worth to work a TCU volleyball. I started chit-chatting with the official scorekeeper and it's like she spotted me and KNEW I was a Nebraskan. It's like we bonded without ever saying we were born and raised in Nebraska. She said something about how she reffed some games for Chadron State a few months ago. We chit-chatted about Chadron State and her family in Western Nebraska until I realized, "Oh my gosh, I'm from Nebraska, too!" So then I mentioned I was from Nebraska and then we all of a sudden had so much in common.

Oh, and not to mention the time I was in Norman, Oklahoma, for a football game a few months ago. I was wearing a Husker Alumni shirt (no, I didn't wear THAT to a Sooners game) and some lady came up to me and asked me where I was from. Come to find out, her dad (or was it grandpa?) built the church I grew up in. I'm telling you, Nebraskans are freaking everywhere. And they can sense other Nebraskans around them. It's weird.

4. I prefer cowboys.
Before I moved to Texas, I was a businessman sort of gal. Love me some men who wear suits and ties to work every day. All of that has changed down here. Give me a man who works with his hands on a ranch all day. Now I'm prowling for cowboys. There is something so damn sexy about a Texas cowboy. It's like they're more legit than Nebraska cowboys (even though I know that's not the truth). But everytime I see a guy in a Cowboy hat, I think to myself, "Could this guy be the next George Strait?" Even if he's missing all of his teeth and half of his hair, I'm still drawn like a moth to a flame.

Okay, that's my list for now. Sorry it's only a list of four items. I decided if I go any longer, I might completely bore you to death. (Well, actually, my lunch break is up and I don't want to appear to be a slacker.) I'll add more items at a later date.

Thank you all for your love and support on my journey!

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